How to have a conversation across time and space

(But it's going to be a frustrating one.)

In the 2006 science fiction romantic comedy The Lake House, Sandra Bullock stars as someone who’s able to mysteriously communicate through time with a previous resident of her house (played by Keanu Reeves) through a magic mailbox. Bullock’s character, a lovelorn doctor, places letters inside the mailbox in 2006, and Reeves’ character—an architect, because male leads in romantic comedies are usually architects—reads them in 2004. Across this poorly-explained divide, they forge a bond and, eventually, find love.

Now—to be clear, I have not actually seen The Lake House. But I have read the plot summary of the film on Wikipedia, and I feel like I can really relate to this movie on multiple levels. First, because I love stupid time-travel premises, but second—and far more importantly—I am in the midst of a similar, ongoing conversation through the fabric of space and time with the previous owner(s) of my house.

My conversation, however, consists mostly of me exasperatedly yelling “what the …