It's easy being green.

The Friday newsletter turns over a new leaf, and then eats it.

I want you to understand that I have range.

You see, the foods featured in these Friday newsletters have often tended toward the… shall we say, heavy? My most beloved creation is a spicy fried pork sandwich. I dedicated an entire weekend to beef. And, lest we forget, last weekend I created a diabolical culinary abomination, filling a British picnic pie with loaded cheeseburger fillings.

I swear I don’t always eat like this.

I mean, yes — I enjoy a big, hearty meal. My favorite party trick for years has been to smoke a whole pork butt, because it’s cheap, easy and delicious. In the last few weeks, I stocked my freezer for the next six months with meats from my favorite mail-order butcher. But if we’re being real? I don’t actually eat a ton of meat on a day-to-day basis, and I’m perfectly happy going without.

In fact — and this may come as a surprise — I was once a vegetarian for almost two years. I’d like to tell you that I did it for entirely the right reasons: concern for the environment…