25 Comments
Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

From the Mixed-Up Files of Mr. Scott A. Cookbook

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

Speaking of childhood phobias. I was somehow convinced those worms that come out after it rains could bore into your feet and should be avoided at all costs (I think one of my boy cousins called them bloodsuckers and it stuck). I still walk around them to this day even though my logical brain knows it's bs.

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well great now I'm afraid of that too

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

Quicksand is real and alive in Maine. A woman just sunk to her waist a few weeks ago. I’ve lived in Maine for 20 years and never encountered it but it was a wake up call to pay more attention when I heard this story.

https://www.wmtw.com/article/quicksand-at-a-popular-maine-beach/61008050

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Amazing that this is the second comment today that I can reply to confirming that I have a healthy, respect-based fear of Maine!

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founding
Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

Store abandonment, aka Dad Park

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Jun 20Liked by Scott Hines

Expectation: flying cars

Reality: electric trucks that rust

Expectation: robot housekeeper from the jetsons

Reality: roomba stuck under sofa

Expectation: fancy job, corner office, business suits

Reality: please do not make me wear pants

Some wins, some losses.

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Jun 19Liked by Scott Hines

The guillotine fear is interesting, because as a child, I became deeply concerned that through a series of unfortunate events, I would one day find myself executed via electric chair. Death by electrocution occupied a non-trivial amount of my thoughts circa age 6-8.

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

I work in software and the thing that chaps my ass about AI the most is that all of these industry leaders are constantly ringing alarm bells about how AI will absolutely annihilate mankind. They are literally building bunkers and hoarding machine guns to ride out an apocalypse:

https://futurism.com/the-byte/openai-ceo-survivalist-prepper

And after they do these interviews, they say something like "Well, would you look at the time! I gotta get back to the Doomsday Factory. The world ain't gonna end itself!"

Is it a little bit of ego and self-importance with this prepper shit? For sure. But these are also the people who are supposed to know the most about AI and they're ready for T2 style Judgement Day.

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

As a youth I was petrified of the “Dead End” sign thinking that if you traveled down to the end of that road, you would meet your demise.

To be fair, the sign probably does have that double meaning on some of those roads in rural Maine

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author

Stephen King installed a proper fear of Maine in me.

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

I don't know Im still fearful about the AI leading us to extinction, maybe not the level of Terminator, but some moron doing something they shouldn't just to prove a point, and blip it's all over. Then again I did ask it to tell me the historical events between five days, and it wanted to provide me with events for the first date given, soooo yeah.

Childhood expectation - living in the type of house my parent's bought.

Adult reality - wondering if money is real when looking at house prices.

Childhood expectation - house projects/cooking projects only take about 30-60min

Adult reality - still have 3 house projects unfinished and that dinner that was suppose to take 20 mins has stretched into 1 hr... Why do they tell us lies?

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author

first, caramelize onions (5-6 minutes)...

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

Based on TV news and school programs from Back Then, I've encountered far fewer vicious pit bull gangs and drug dealers than I'd been told to anticipate.

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I expected roving street toughs like River City Ransom or Double Dragon, and despite what certain flavors of media would try to convince you, they're just not there!

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

I could live in a Meijer forever. "Aisle 6? That's Blanx's aisle now."

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

The store abandonment thing raises a couple of questions: which store could you last the longest in before getting bored if you were “abandoned” there, and which store could you survive the longest in if you were for-real abandoned in there?

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Boredom: Jungle Jim's in Fairfield, Ohio

Survival: Meijer

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

Leave me in a Costco and I can manage to set up camp at the top of one of those shelves never to be discovered. I'd have clothing, food, electronics, medication, books, and uh, don't question why the store keeps running out of chicken bakes.

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

Alrighty, Chuck Mangione

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carpenter bees boring through grout? Jeebus. They're bad down here, but it's usually fascia board, front porch joists, or similar. I've also heard tell that a little hot sauce and a squirt gun is a great preventative. Unless they evolve and develop a taste for the spicy juice...then we're screwed!

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it was a real journey from "where are all these bees coming from?" to "are you freaking kidding me"

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Based on my futile fights against bind weed, the rescue vine is the true villain in the quick sand scenario.

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did you call it Ver-say-els like a good Ohioan?

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Jun 18Liked by Scott Hines

it’s only versailles if it’s from the guillotine region of france, otherwise is just sparkling versailles

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