22 Comments
May 23Liked by Scott Hines

The one event at my kids' elementary that I'd keep separate is "international night." We had kids from about two dozen countries at the neighborhood school and people went all out -- food, tourism-promotion posters from the embassy, music. It was even better than chips and salsa.

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Okay, that sounds like a lot of fun!

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The HS where I work does one of these yearly and it's easily the most popular event. We have something like 48 languages and 100+ countries represented here and it's always an incredibly supportive event. We can't get more than a handful of folks to turn out for band concerts or plays, but I Night packs the place.

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Our elementary school does this and coincidentally enough it was today (ours is international lunch). My mom contributed a flan. I couldn't attend today but my son said all the food was great and they all had a wonderful time.

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

The big concern about activities being at Ryan's house is if a wandering bachelorette party wanders over and ruins all of the children's activities. There is a betting line on that occurring though.

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That's a parlay with the win-place-show ordering in the sack race.

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

Sign up with code “COOKBOOK” to get 50% match on your first deposit!

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

Holy crap, my kids' middle school band played a song called "Chips and Salsa" you might be on to something here

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This was a delightful read.

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

8th grade mass. 8th grade breakfast. 8th grade dance. 8th grade graduation. 8th grade parking lot party.

Just let them go back to the actual good old days of school when 8th grade graduation was when the bell rang for the final time on the last day of school (which is only allowed to be a friday, and definitely at the normal ass time)

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

Wait, I thought he got fired.

Good to see you, Ryan. My kids are in their late-20s now, but just reading that brought back a few involuntary shudders about all those elementary school events.

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I don't have any kids and am in my late 30s and I shuddered at being the subject of these events.

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

Thanks for the warning regarding Thursday. This time last year I would have scoffed “pshh, of course I know what day it is, how stupid does he think I am?” Today, I had a mini panic attack thinking it’s Friday because my seven month old decided to wake up at 5am (?) and the dog also decided to get up at 5 am (??). My brain is fried, is what I’m saying

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I have been unsure all week, so I didn't want to contribute to the dissonance.

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My daughter believes that the days of the week go Monday, Tuesday, 1919, Garbage Day, Show and Tell

So I’m frequently disoriented

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Is Wednesday root beer day at your house? (If so, I'd like to visit.)

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I have no children, but I was a week early for something last night. In conclusion, time is malleable.

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May 23Liked by Scott Hines

I feel incredibly seen here as I stare at the kitchen table with flyers for “art night”, “movie night” and “color run” all while I’m mentally preparing myself for Friday when I’m chaperoning the middle school orchestra’s regional competition and trip to Six Flags New England (appropriately titled “trills and thrills”).

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Looking forward to Ryan's Thursday contribution next week titled COUNTERPOINT: Maybe work should just be cool with us leaving early for kid stuff all the time and still pay us!

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Having just finished up the final elementary school end of school gauntlet of theme days (Y Ferch starts middle school next year and none of us are prepared for this in any way), I will somewhat miss them. I will not miss the mad scramble of realising that the theme day is today and it is 7:45 am and we're already walking to school, but I will miss the excitement and tales from the day when she gets home. And the commiserating with other relatively normal parents at the thing that none of us were ready, despite several reminders and what not.

Any how, on to middle school.

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*me, frantically waving a $20 bill and slamming a rolled up program against my leg*

"RUN JODY!!! RUN GODDAMMIT!!!"

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founding

Coastal elite is weary of celebration

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