YOU IZ GUD REPORTER OLAF. HAZ WATCHED ABOUT A THOUSAND "DETROIT TIGERS" GAMES WITH DG OVER LAST FOURTEEN SEASONS. HE SCOWLS AND USES A LOT OF THOSE ATE-STUFF-OFF-THE-COUNTER WORDS. WUZ EXCITED A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO WHEN HE SAID I'D BE BETTER SHORTSTOP SINCE I WUD AT LEAST CHASE BALL, BUT STILL NEVER GOT SPECIAL SHIRT. MAYBE NEXT SPRING.
The too big to fail is great. Had a big ole dog growing up and he ate an entire giant chocolate bunny without even a blimp to the point we wondered if he actually got it. When he pooped foil it was confirmed.
He's gotten better about it (or we've gotten better about not leaving stuff out), but in his first year in the house he ate half an advent calendar (cardboard and chocolate), part of a chocolate bunny, and one of the (thankfully, hollow) giant Ferrero Rocher balls (foil included).
I pulled up the "does my dog need to go to the hospital" calculator, and realized it takes a LOT to hurt an 80-lb dog.
'The people used to be a lot more careful about what they fed me. Then I ate some Easter candy and they freaked out, but I was fine. They looked up some calculator, and he called me “too big to fail”.'
In the period after I adopted my last dog, but before my roommate internalized that we had 2 dogs in the apartment now not just his, he was baking in the kitchen, and left stuff out for a break and took his dog into the living room.
My dog ate a pound of butter, half a chocolate cake, and a graham cracker pie crust. I braced for the worst but...she was fine. Not even diarrhea. His dog had a bit of a sensitive stomach and once had the shits in his crate, while wagging, so he hippoed liquid poo on the ceiling. You could smell it out in the hallway.
Too big to fail perfectly encompassed my parent’s dog, Auggie.
On separate occasions he ate: a wicker basket and the 16 blueberry muffins they were holding, a camera, and a whole winter coat (we found the zipper, zipped up, once the snow melted). He was basically a golden retriever version of the Very Hungry Caterpillar.
My hubby is a lifelong fan of those “vile and detestable Yankees.” I can usually tell how well or how badly it’s going by the shouts of “Couldn’t hit it with a DOOR!” My sympathies to Olaf - this is not an easy time for any of us bystanders.
Perfection thy name is Olaf. Truly a great read. I can only imagine what my cats thought last Saturday night. Both were on the couches, then they disappeared about 5 minutes left in the game. They were kind enough to come tell me it was time for bed after midnight. They are good cats.
Good to know I'm not the only one switching clothes after a bad inning.
When I left town to go on vacation, I left all my Dodgers clothes out on the floor exactly where they were because they won when those clothes were in those locations. They lost the game on my return flight, so I have now gone ahead and "washed off the loss"
(dictated but not read) was perfect
YOU IZ GUD REPORTER OLAF. HAZ WATCHED ABOUT A THOUSAND "DETROIT TIGERS" GAMES WITH DG OVER LAST FOURTEEN SEASONS. HE SCOWLS AND USES A LOT OF THOSE ATE-STUFF-OFF-THE-COUNTER WORDS. WUZ EXCITED A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO WHEN HE SAID I'D BE BETTER SHORTSTOP SINCE I WUD AT LEAST CHASE BALL, BUT STILL NEVER GOT SPECIAL SHIRT. MAYBE NEXT SPRING.
The too big to fail is great. Had a big ole dog growing up and he ate an entire giant chocolate bunny without even a blimp to the point we wondered if he actually got it. When he pooped foil it was confirmed.
He's gotten better about it (or we've gotten better about not leaving stuff out), but in his first year in the house he ate half an advent calendar (cardboard and chocolate), part of a chocolate bunny, and one of the (thankfully, hollow) giant Ferrero Rocher balls (foil included).
I pulled up the "does my dog need to go to the hospital" calculator, and realized it takes a LOT to hurt an 80-lb dog.
OLAF JUST LIKES THE BABY JESUS, OK?
legitimately laughed out loud in my office.
Any dog story that includes the phrase "when he pooped foil" is guaranteed funny.
Every xmas my aunt's dog would have 'streamers' of tinsel....good times.
'The people used to be a lot more careful about what they fed me. Then I ate some Easter candy and they freaked out, but I was fine. They looked up some calculator, and he called me “too big to fail”.'
In the period after I adopted my last dog, but before my roommate internalized that we had 2 dogs in the apartment now not just his, he was baking in the kitchen, and left stuff out for a break and took his dog into the living room.
My dog ate a pound of butter, half a chocolate cake, and a graham cracker pie crust. I braced for the worst but...she was fine. Not even diarrhea. His dog had a bit of a sensitive stomach and once had the shits in his crate, while wagging, so he hippoed liquid poo on the ceiling. You could smell it out in the hallway.
"He’s standing up now.
Should I stand up too?
I’ll stand up too. Show moral support."
"Every man that I don’t know."
"(I like treats. I must be doing a good job out here.)"
"WE’RE YELLING BUT IT SEEMS LIKE GOOD YELLING?"
The whole cat-yelling bit too. Stellar work, this.
Too big to fail perfectly encompassed my parent’s dog, Auggie.
On separate occasions he ate: a wicker basket and the 16 blueberry muffins they were holding, a camera, and a whole winter coat (we found the zipper, zipped up, once the snow melted). He was basically a golden retriever version of the Very Hungry Caterpillar.
My hubby is a lifelong fan of those “vile and detestable Yankees.” I can usually tell how well or how badly it’s going by the shouts of “Couldn’t hit it with a DOOR!” My sympathies to Olaf - this is not an easy time for any of us bystanders.
playoff baseball is a ton of fun, as long as your team isn't involved
I love how every photo has the one-ear-up-and-one-ear-down look. That's a dog that knows how to win you over, no matter what they just got into.
the ears are like that by default. only time they're not that way is if he's tucking them back to look even more needy
Perfection thy name is Olaf. Truly a great read. I can only imagine what my cats thought last Saturday night. Both were on the couches, then they disappeared about 5 minutes left in the game. They were kind enough to come tell me it was time for bed after midnight. They are good cats.
Good to know I'm not the only one switching clothes after a bad inning.
When I left town to go on vacation, I left all my Dodgers clothes out on the floor exactly where they were because they won when those clothes were in those locations. They lost the game on my return flight, so I have now gone ahead and "washed off the loss"
OLAF!!! I LOVE YOU, YOU BIG SWEET BABY!!
Every Olaf expression causes white noise to happen in my brain