I loved going grocery shopping with my mom. Not to help, but because in Meijer's back then they had the Meijer Oasis- it was a totally unsupervised playroom in the middle of the store, where parents would drop off their kids while they shopped. It was the Lord of the Flies in suburban Detroit, you'd come out bruised, beaten and sore.
I remember seeing Mad Max beyond thunderdome some years later, and thinking "I've seen this place before."
Local place serves a 28 inch "colossal" pie, previous iteration of the business had a rule that if you ate the whole thing in an hour it would be free. I was really tempted to try it, but I chickened out.
There's another fun tension in the parking lot when you have to hope/pray that there is a Car Cart or else all heck breaks loose when the kids have to endure the ignominy of riding in a *scoff* regular boring cart.
Also so well written. With a 3/5y right now, this all hit all the stress and frustrations of going to the grocery store with them. Then the last paragraph had to go and ruin the self-pity I was feeling and make me realize it's all worth it. Thank you.
One of the stores we frequented had the carts, but their storage/parking area near the entrance sat in full sun if you arrived anytime after 2P to sundown, so the carts were way too hot for the kids to enjoy. It was the worst roller coaster of elation to immediate disappointment. Get an awning, #store!
"Unless one of them stabs another shopper today, I am buying them the things they have requested."
When I was like 7 or 8 a guy at the grocery store did actually threaten to stab me when I was there with my dad. Not sure what I did, must've been annoying.
Those last 3 paragraphs. Keep seizing them while they last. They are gone in the blink of an eye. And visits home no matter how long are still visits. This summer is likely the last one our younger child will live at home. And I mourn the loss even as I celebrate the success of raising an independent (reasonably) well-adjusted child.
My mother hated going grocery shopping but it was where I learned all sorts of things from her from couponing, prices, and how to take advantage of a sale.
I take my daughter now and she typically has 2 requests, blueberries (which I generally don’t say no to) and Frozen/Paw Patrol Mac and cheese (it has to be on sale.) she’s starting to understand that a yellow ticket means a sale.
The other day I told her we didn’t have something and she went to the table and got the grocery pad and a pen and said “Dada put on list.” A girl after my heart.
Oh, whoa, that's nothing like the car carts we have.
Fair warning, as you get older the fights will soon become who gets to push the cart. My Olaf of a son is the oldest, but for some reason in spite of YEARS of reminders, has the uncanny desire to be at least seven steps ahead of everyone. Sure son, you can push the cart, but dad is in the front to steer and keep other shoppers heels from being destroyed by your haste. STOP PUSHING AGAINST ME. SLOW. WAIT. STOP PUSHING. SLOW. Ah crap, we just passed three things on the list. NOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I AM NOT RACING? STOP PUSHING. AND WHERE IS YOUR SISTER? Crap.
There's a reason why I wait until the kids are down or getting ready for bed before I head off to gather groceries..
Target shopping carts with the big, plastic, kid seats with buckles closer to the pusher instead of in the front like the "car" ones at grocery stores are so much better for maneuverability. Too bad they cannot engineer a dividing wall into either to prevent the inevitable squabbling.
"Fortunately", both my kids are big enough now that they only want to ride inside the main part of the cart or hang onto the side so we look like the opening credits of the Jackass movie.
My dad used to take us three boys with him to the store, i think to give my mom some peace after he got off work. we’d always go after dinner, it was like a special treat for us to stay up and go to the grocery store after 8pm. Our treat was always the same but it was always great: SweeTarts. He’d buy two rolls, split em in half, and we could stay up until we finished them! (like ten minutes, max. we always tried to make it last but, come on, it was candy)
My dad used to take my brother and I out on Saturday mornings to the Cold Cut Store (actual name) and his trick was to open a bag a chips while we waited. We had a whole morning of errands like that. Sundays were for trips to the Italian bakery and the Sunday Times.
After my younger daughter was born, my older daughter and I would do a weekly shop for "fresh" foods at the local whole foods (I know, I know, but if you'd seen the produce section at the safeway we could walk to, you'd understand) during nap time. My daughter loved it because of my strategic use of fruit and cheese samples, plus she got out of the house, important to the extrovert's extrovert. I eventually got fired because my wife did meal planning by vibes and I was not adequately tuned into the vibes to vary what I was buying (I need a list, and I make no apologies for it!). Anyway, my older girl is 20 now and the other night we were in Target for a no-hurry vibes-only trip so that she could round out her supplies before going back to college next week, so all is not lost to the aging process. She does get a little mad when I warn her about cars backing out of spaces in the parking lot though.
I have never in my life seen a shopping cart like this. The ones here are like a hollow chassis that sits on the frame of the cart itself. This would be insane in a grocery store.
When my daughter was little, I would put her in the baby carrier (facing front) and take her through the store. She would smile angelically at everyone and get all the ooohs and aaahs you would expect from a dimpled chubby little face. Except, once she got to the dairy section she was done. So while smiling at everyone, she'd be pulling my arm hairs out. She also did this to beard hairs.
She is six, loves this story and makes me tell it all the time.
One of my dad's most important contributions to the household was watching the kids so my mom could grocery shop in peace. It wasn't so important by the time I was born but when my brother and sisters were 4, 2, and newborn it was a lifesaver. He did a lot more around the house than most dads of their generation but this was the one my mom appreciated the most because he volunteered for it before she even really thought about asking him.
Thank you for this mental image. I can see his head hanging out the side, tongue flapping eagerly, and looking back in the most "go faster, dang it!" look.
Aug 17, 2022·edited Aug 18, 2022Liked by Scott Hines
I am the grocery shopper for the family but to no one's surprise, I have made an excellent Excel spreadsheet grocery list that is prepopulated with staples and goes in my preferred order for the Kroger.
I like to avoid involving my son because he once tried to take out my Achilles with the cart.
I loved going grocery shopping with my mom. Not to help, but because in Meijer's back then they had the Meijer Oasis- it was a totally unsupervised playroom in the middle of the store, where parents would drop off their kids while they shopped. It was the Lord of the Flies in suburban Detroit, you'd come out bruised, beaten and sore.
I remember seeing Mad Max beyond thunderdome some years later, and thinking "I've seen this place before."
They had these back home where my sister shopped, and I was instantly jealous.
I'm pretty sure the serving size of pringles is one can.
are you my son
Wine, pizza, chips, 6 packs of beer, and cheese blocks are all single serving containers.
Any pizza is a personal pizza as long as you're not a coward.
Local place serves a 28 inch "colossal" pie, previous iteration of the business had a rule that if you ate the whole thing in an hour it would be free. I was really tempted to try it, but I chickened out.
I must be getting old, because 6 of the beers I end up drinking would be a ROUGH morning.
two kids? absolutely.
There's another fun tension in the parking lot when you have to hope/pray that there is a Car Cart or else all heck breaks loose when the kids have to endure the ignominy of riding in a *scoff* regular boring cart.
Also so well written. With a 3/5y right now, this all hit all the stress and frustrations of going to the grocery store with them. Then the last paragraph had to go and ruin the self-pity I was feeling and make me realize it's all worth it. Thank you.
One of the stores we frequented had the carts, but their storage/parking area near the entrance sat in full sun if you arrived anytime after 2P to sundown, so the carts were way too hot for the kids to enjoy. It was the worst roller coaster of elation to immediate disappointment. Get an awning, #store!
"Unless one of them stabs another shopper today, I am buying them the things they have requested."
When I was like 7 or 8 a guy at the grocery store did actually threaten to stab me when I was there with my dad. Not sure what I did, must've been annoying.
I like the level of self-awareness to know that it was most likely your fault and not just some deranged adult.
Those last 3 paragraphs. Keep seizing them while they last. They are gone in the blink of an eye. And visits home no matter how long are still visits. This summer is likely the last one our younger child will live at home. And I mourn the loss even as I celebrate the success of raising an independent (reasonably) well-adjusted child.
My mother hated going grocery shopping but it was where I learned all sorts of things from her from couponing, prices, and how to take advantage of a sale.
I take my daughter now and she typically has 2 requests, blueberries (which I generally don’t say no to) and Frozen/Paw Patrol Mac and cheese (it has to be on sale.) she’s starting to understand that a yellow ticket means a sale.
The other day I told her we didn’t have something and she went to the table and got the grocery pad and a pen and said “Dada put on list.” A girl after my heart.
Oh, whoa, that's nothing like the car carts we have.
Fair warning, as you get older the fights will soon become who gets to push the cart. My Olaf of a son is the oldest, but for some reason in spite of YEARS of reminders, has the uncanny desire to be at least seven steps ahead of everyone. Sure son, you can push the cart, but dad is in the front to steer and keep other shoppers heels from being destroyed by your haste. STOP PUSHING AGAINST ME. SLOW. WAIT. STOP PUSHING. SLOW. Ah crap, we just passed three things on the list. NOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I AM NOT RACING? STOP PUSHING. AND WHERE IS YOUR SISTER? Crap.
There's a reason why I wait until the kids are down or getting ready for bed before I head off to gather groceries..
Target shopping carts with the big, plastic, kid seats with buckles closer to the pusher instead of in the front like the "car" ones at grocery stores are so much better for maneuverability. Too bad they cannot engineer a dividing wall into either to prevent the inevitable squabbling.
"Fortunately", both my kids are big enough now that they only want to ride inside the main part of the cart or hang onto the side so we look like the opening credits of the Jackass movie.
My dad used to take us three boys with him to the store, i think to give my mom some peace after he got off work. we’d always go after dinner, it was like a special treat for us to stay up and go to the grocery store after 8pm. Our treat was always the same but it was always great: SweeTarts. He’d buy two rolls, split em in half, and we could stay up until we finished them! (like ten minutes, max. we always tried to make it last but, come on, it was candy)
My dad used to take my brother and I out on Saturday mornings to the Cold Cut Store (actual name) and his trick was to open a bag a chips while we waited. We had a whole morning of errands like that. Sundays were for trips to the Italian bakery and the Sunday Times.
The Cold Cut Store sounds like heaven. I want to go to there.
[to the tune of 50 Cent’s “Candy Shop”] I’ll take you to the cold cut store
i’ll let you get ham and more
let’s see the meat we can score
osha gets mad when it hits the floor, whoa
After my younger daughter was born, my older daughter and I would do a weekly shop for "fresh" foods at the local whole foods (I know, I know, but if you'd seen the produce section at the safeway we could walk to, you'd understand) during nap time. My daughter loved it because of my strategic use of fruit and cheese samples, plus she got out of the house, important to the extrovert's extrovert. I eventually got fired because my wife did meal planning by vibes and I was not adequately tuned into the vibes to vary what I was buying (I need a list, and I make no apologies for it!). Anyway, my older girl is 20 now and the other night we were in Target for a no-hurry vibes-only trip so that she could round out her supplies before going back to college next week, so all is not lost to the aging process. She does get a little mad when I warn her about cars backing out of spaces in the parking lot though.
I have never in my life seen a shopping cart like this. The ones here are like a hollow chassis that sits on the frame of the cart itself. This would be insane in a grocery store.
it IS insane in a grocery store!
When my daughter was little, I would put her in the baby carrier (facing front) and take her through the store. She would smile angelically at everyone and get all the ooohs and aaahs you would expect from a dimpled chubby little face. Except, once she got to the dairy section she was done. So while smiling at everyone, she'd be pulling my arm hairs out. She also did this to beard hairs.
She is six, loves this story and makes me tell it all the time.
One of my dad's most important contributions to the household was watching the kids so my mom could grocery shop in peace. It wasn't so important by the time I was born but when my brother and sisters were 4, 2, and newborn it was a lifesaver. He did a lot more around the house than most dads of their generation but this was the one my mom appreciated the most because he volunteered for it before she even really thought about asking him.
"There’ll be a day where I walk past that car cart and don’t have anyone with me who’ll fit inside it or even want to"
Olaf?
Thank you for this mental image. I can see his head hanging out the side, tongue flapping eagerly, and looking back in the most "go faster, dang it!" look.
I am the grocery shopper for the family but to no one's surprise, I have made an excellent Excel spreadsheet grocery list that is prepopulated with staples and goes in my preferred order for the Kroger.
I like to avoid involving my son because he once tried to take out my Achilles with the cart.
It’s fun to remember what bribe placated you into behaving at a store as a child. Orange Tic-Tacs were my jam, no I don’t know why.
Tic Tacs were exciting back then! I think it was the plastic case that made them feel special.
This is correct. The case felt so important, you needed to save it for reuse.