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This is much where I'm at. There are times--like this week--where I do think it would just be easier to leave, but then--I'm not European. I'm not anything but American, for better or for worse, and I don't *want* to leave.

But it gets harder and harder to hold on to that feeling.

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I was on vacation in Europe last week and when someone in my news/politics group chat posted that this had happened my exact words were "I'm going to fuck back off to Ireland now." I don't actually mean it, but also, it's insane how much safer it felt over there knowing that basically no one has guns *and* people drive sanely sized vehicles on roads that are designed for pedestrians to be able to use first and for cars second.

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I am at the point where I mostly want to leave. I don't have any common ground with the gunfuckers, nor do I want any. So, I look at emigration policies, and dream.

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My wife's job could allow us to transplant to Switzerland and goddamn it that sounds honestly great. I really want to encourage her to transfer, but ultimately, her whole family is here (mine too, but she cares about hers) and it seems unlikely.

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